New Year and Stuff

I had a super chill New Year's Eve that mostly involved watching "The Wire" and eating pretzels and drinking champagne.  I thought about going out and stuff, even got dressed up, but damn.  NYE is like doing the same thing as every other Friday night, but at 3x the price.  Maybe I'm just getting old, but that doesn't sound like any kind of fun for me.  And being away for so long, it was nice to just be at home.  So that's where I stayed.

Writing is hard work, which some of you already know.  This article/chapter is ridiculous.  I sort of know what it's about, but it's crazy how hard it is to just sit down and write a story.  To write good history, you have to write a good story.  It's really hard to do when you're not sure what story you want to tell.  Am I telling the story of a power struggle in the 19th century, or am I telling the story of how I'm trying to tell the story?  Both things need to happen in this article, and I haven't figured out how to do that yet.  This draft is due on the 17th, but for me will done by the 14th because I'm leaving for DC that weekend to visit friends.  So we'll see what happens.

Today was a good cooking/baking day.  I ended the year with a boeuf bourguignon and ricotta cheesecake, both of which I mastered in 2010 (much to the delight of my roommate and other friends).  I started 2011 with fresh French bread, oatmeal and millet muffins, a baked ham, and some tomato mac and cheese (gruyere bechamel with a little paprika, sliced tomato pulp, and fusilli pasta.  Textbook "Joy of Cooking.").

The muffins are some of my favorite that I've ever tasted.  I got the recipe from a friend and today was the first time I tried them, mostly because it took me a while to find millet flour.  Whole Foods finally came through for me, but it's pretty obnoxious that Ralph's doesn't have something so seemingly mundane.  So instead of having to go to 2 stores the other day, I had to go to 3.  There has to be a better way to do food in this country.  Sigh.  Anywho, I made them around lunchtime.  They are definitely not for anyone watching their diet in the New Year, but anyone who knows me knows I don't support that shit.  Be healthy, but don't police your body and shame yourself.  Food is for nourishment and energy, but it's also for enjoyment.  If it's not worth savoring and indulging a little, frankly, it's not worth eating. 

I don't make resolutions or the like, but it's hard not to do a little reflecting and evaluating at the New Year, especially as I prepare for a year with so much transition.  I'll turn 30 in a few months.  I'll leave California for an uncertain and unclear future.  I won't have a "home" for a while, something I've clung to zealously for the last 29 years.  I feel like this year is when I finally have to jump off the cliff, and hope to Isis or Ishtar or Baby Jesus or the Black Madonna of Kibeho that I land somewhere, in one piece, and preferably with my cat, my mental health, and sense of who I am intact.

In that spirit, I guess I will continue to renew the promise I make to myself every day, to follow my instincts, to never talk shit about me, to forgive, and to love without regret.  I hope you will do the same.  And eat these muffins, because they're fucking delicious.

Oatmeal and Millet Muffins

You’ll need:

1 ¼ cups boiling water
1 cup uncooked instant rolled oats
½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter at room temperature
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 eggs
1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
½ cup millet

How to make:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter muffin tin or line the tin with paper muffin cups.
Stir the oats into the boiling water, cover, remove from heat and let stand for 20 minutes. Cool.
Sift together the flour, baking soda, and salt.
In a large mixing bowl, beat the butter until creamy. Slowly add the white and brown sugars, beating until smooth and creamy. Add the vanilla and the eggs and beat until well blended.
Add the cooled oatmeal to the butter mixture and stir well to blend.
Add the flour mixture and stir.
Stir in the millet.
Spoon the batter into the muffin cups, filling about 2/3 full. Bake for about 15 minutes, or until a straw inserted in the center of the muffin comes out clean.
Gently run a knife around the edge of each muffin, left them out and place on a rack to cool.
These muffins freeze well.